Ready for some hilarious, naughty fun? Meet the Oliphant brothers and their circus of a family...
Laird Oliphant's sons have to get married. Without an heir, he's gathered his sons--his six illegitimate sons, all born in the same year--and declared whoever presents him with a grandson first will become the next Highland laird.
A Scot Mess
To Finn Oliphant, his father's ultimatum is exactly the news he's been waiting for. You see, he's already chosen his wife: the vivacious and intelligent Fiona MacIan, whom he fell in love with last year. She's in love with him, so this whole "marriage ultimatum" thing should be easy-peasy. He'll invite her to the Oliphant keep with her brother the laird, in order to sign all the betrothal contracts, and Bam! Done! They can get on with the babies!
It's not that Fiona is getting cold feet, exactly. She's fairly certain she loves Finn. Mostly. Well, verra likely, at least. But she's never been the most self-confident of women, especially compared to her sister. Her identical twin sister, whom Finn mistakes for her upon arrival, which is super-awkward all around.
The idea of marrying Finn makes her warm and giddy--hopefully that's just lust, not the ague--but how can she be certain he wants her? It's hard enough to be certain of anything on Oliphant land, what with mad Aunt Agatha spreading rumors, five potential brothers-in-law offering terrible advice, and a mysterious ghostly drummer keeping them awake at all hours. And mayhap Finn should've mentioned his identical twin brother, too? That would have saved everyone a lot of headache...and heartbreak.
Finn and Fiona have plenty to learn about themselves and one another before they can be certain this marriage is a good idea. But unfortunately, they're running out of time. Dun-dun-duuuuuuuun!
Warning: this comedy of errors is not for the uptight. There's plenty of naughty scenes, more than a few anachronistic jokes, and an embarrassing number of mistaken-identity gags. Only pick up this book if you have a sense of humor, please.
Scot on her Trail
Duncan Oliphant's father has insisted he--and all of his brothers--marry and start producing grandsons...like, yesterday. And Dunc is having none of it. All he wants in life is a small cottage behind his forge and enough gold and silver to craft valuable delicate jewelry.
But he is the laird's son, albeit illegitimate, and he knows he has a duty to do; one he's happy to postpone, as he takes one more commission, which has him traveling across the Highlands, gold in hand.
Which is, of course, the worst time to be attacked by highwaymen.
Even worse if it's not a man at all, but a highwaywoman--a gorgeous, feisty one he accidentally kissed a fortnight ago at his brother's wedding. What in the world is Skye MacIan doing, robbing unsuspecting travelers? The only way to discover the truth--and get back his gold--is to kidnap the highwaywoman and offer a trade.
Aye, this will go swimmingly...until it doesn't.
Skye clearly isn't a meek and delicate lady. And despite their rocky beginning, she simply can't ignore the way Duncan's kisses made her feel, or how his offered solution might just be what she needs to hang up her sword for good.
Can a goldsmith who only wants a simple life make peace with a determined highwaywoman, for the sake of their clans' futures? Or is the gulf between them--and their own personal history--just too much for them to overcome?
And whatever did happen to all that gold?
Pick up the second book in the riotously funny The Hots for Scots series and get ready for a rollicking good time!
Getting Scot and Bothered
Rocque Oliphant has simple wants: a fine sword at his hip, a good meal in his belly, and a lusty wench by his side. His position as the Oliphant Commander, leader of men, ensures the first, and his long-term affair with Merewyn, the clan healer, ensures the second and third. She brings him joy--and pleasure--in way she once only dreamed of!
Aye, things are going well in his life...at least they were, right up until his father--the laird--demanded he marry and start producing grandsons. If Rocque wants to beat his brothers at a chance for the lairdship, he needs to find a willing woman to bear his sons--and fast!
But Merewyn, the stubborn lass, refuses to marry him and won't tell him why. Rocque can't imagine spending his life with anyone else! So if he can't marry another lass, and the one he wants won't marry him, what chance does he have to secure the title of the new laird?
As the Oliphant healer, Merewyn knows her value to the clan. She is also quite aware she doesn't need to marry...and the only way she will, is for love. And Rocque, stubborn idiot that he is, won't tell her his true feelings. Can she be blamed for saying nay to his proposal? But now she's running out of time and knows she has no choice but to tell him the truth, or set him free, because in a few months, everyone in the clan will know her secret!
Rocque might have more brawn than brains, but he's smart enough to know he can't lose Merewyn. But is he prepared for the battle it's going to take to prove that to her?
Warning: This story contains naughty bits. Lots of them. Ridiculous amounts. Also contains characters and conversations which are funny enough to make you spit out your tea. For the sake of your Kindle, do not drink while reading this book. That is all; you may now carry on.
In Scot Water
Malcolm Oliphant is, beyond a doubt, the brains of the family. Since his father, the laird, announced whichever brother could marry and produce a son first would become the heir, Malcolm's brothers have been running around, falling in love willy-nilly, without using their brains at all. But not Malcolm, oh no. He plans to do this intelligently.
He'll find a widow with a son or two, thus proving her ability to bear male offspring, and explain to her they will be married. See? Simple. No need to bring emotions into it.
But when he finally meets the perfect woman for his plan, there's no logical explanation for the way his heart keeps getting involved. It would be so much simpler if the stupid organ would just simmer down, but have you ever tried explaining things to a hunk of meat, whose sole purpose is moving blood around? Impossible! Besides, when Evelinde looks at him, he feels like...a hero.
Evelinde Oliphant's situation is getting desperate. Since her first husband's death, she and her two sons are living alone in what could charitably be called the middle-of-bloody-nowhere, without any real means of support. When a scholarly warrior--one who makes her heart pound with desire--saves her life, how can she not think of him as her very own savior?
Falling in love--and into Malcolm's arms--is the easy part. But what will happen when she learns who he really is, and why he really married her?
Warning: Contains a sausage-obsessed sheepdog; a cheeky, snot-nosed little cherub; and two people who cannot seem to keep their hands off each other, no matter what's considered proper. Get ready for another dose of silliness (with plenty of naughty bits thrown in) from the Oliphants in this laugh-out-loud series!
Drop It Like It's Scot
Alistair Oliphant has devoted his entire life to his clan's well-being. As one of the laird's bastard sons, he's determined to prove his worth by managing the Oliphants' correspondence, alliances, land stewardship, trading schedules, and about a million other--boring--aspects of keeping a busy Highland clan going.
When his father declares whichever of his sons marries and produces a son first will become the next laird, Alistair figures his destiny has finally arrived. The only problem is...he just doesn't have the time to find a wife.
Luckily, he doesn't have to, because right under his oblivious nose is a woman who is ready and willing, and just waiting to hit him over the head with her long-time crush. Lara Oliphant has grown up with the Oliphant bastards, but as their best friend's younger sister, none of them have given her a second look. Which is a shame, because she's done quite a lot of looking herself when it came to Alistair. And as a result of Lara's embarrassingly voyeuristic lifestyle, she's decided she's the only one who can set the poor man straight.
Or rather...not straight.
If Alistair got any straighter, she could shove a wick up his rear and call him a candle. What he needs is someone to show him how to bend, how to relax...how to have a little fun. And Lara is just the woman to do it. Assuming she can convince him to see her as a woman, that is!
Warning: Full of naughty shenanigans and ridiculous jokes, and more than a few eye-rollingly bad puns. Come for the spicy bits, stay for the humor. Welcome to another installment of the hilarious Hots for Scots series!
Scot to the Touch
Six brothers were single at the beginning of this mess, but now there's only one man left standing... Kiergan Oliphant considers himself the only sane one in his family; what other explanation could there be for why all five of his brothers have fallen in love and gotten married, just because their father made a stupid ultimatum? Sure, the laird declared whichever son married and produced a son first would become his heir, but is that really any reason for a man to give up his freedom?
Because if there's one thing Kiergan likes, it's his freedom. And women. And those little berry tart things the cook makes. And the freedom to do things with women. So...four? Aye, four things he likes.
Which is good because there isn't much else he's good at. His brothers all have their talents and responsibilities, while Kiergan has been content to be relegated to the role of the family rake. He has no desire to be the next laird, because it would not only mean less time for pleasure, but it would also mean being saddled with a wife.
Nae thank ye! But of course, his father has other plans.
Enter the MacKinnon sisters: Davina is beautiful, desirable, and would make a brilliant alliance for the Oliphant Clan, while Katlyn is...none of those things. So of course, 'tis Katlyn who intrigues Kiergan the most, with her strange eyes and even stranger ideas.
Katlyn MacKinnon knows exactly who she is, and she knows her worth as well. Upon her birth, the devil himself marked her by giving her eyes of two different colors. Her curse means she'll never marry or secure any alliances, but that doesn't mean she can't have a little fun...
So what happens when these two independent hearts get caught in bed together? Hilarious shenanigans ensue, of course!
Warning: This book contains crude jokes, lewd puns, and more than a little slapstick. Get ready to laugh out loud in this side-splitting adventure, full of secret passages, revolving bookshelves, a damned annoying ghost, and one stubborn rake!
Scot Under the Mistletoe
A year ago, Nessa Oliphant finally landed the man of her dreams in bed...but when her father, the laird, betrothed her to the first Henry, her lover failed to fight for her.
Brohn, the housekeeper's son, might be in command of the Oliphant troops, but knows his duty to the clan is to step aside and let Nessa make a strong betrothal contract. But after seven failed betrothals--all to Henrys--Nessa is done with fiddling around.
It's going to take the legend of the Ghostly Drummer of Oliphant Castle, some random sprigs of mistletoe, and plenty of Yuletide magic to fix this hilarious mess!
Too Scot to Hold
The battle to determine the next laird comes down to this fierce moment…the Oliphant brothers sitting around, drinking ale, while their wives go into labor.
After finishing his studies to become a doctor, Graham followed the woman he loved to Oliphant Castle and discovered—among other things—that he was not the fatherless, family-less bastard he’d always assumed. Well, he was still a bastard, but now he was an Oliphant bastard; he had father who loved him, and six brother who cared as fiercely as they fought. He’d found a home.
And he might’ve been happy, had Davina MacKinnon been allowed to share it with him. But her grandfather has never seen him as good enough for her, or the future of the MacKinnon clan, and despite her sister’s marriage to one of Graham’s brothers, Davina was dragged away.
But now she’s returned to be with her sister during her confinement, and Graham—being a medical man—has been called back to Oliphant Castle as well, to help with all the bairns about to be born. Whichever Oliphant wife births the laird’s first grandson will ensure her husband becomes the next laird, so the stakes are high…But none so high as Graham and Davina’s.
Between the bairns popping out left and right (seriously, this is getting ridiculous), they’ve got to find a way to convince her grandfather they deserve to be together. Luckily, there’s a way to distract the old man, and the Ghostly Drummer of Oliphant Castle might just make a comeback… Warning: Contains anachronistic medical knowledge, rather a lot of madcap hijinks, a few really naughty bits, and more laugh-out-loud moments than you can shake a stick at, were you the kind to shake sticks at things. Check out the grand finale to this hilariously sexy series everyone’s talking about!